


don't carry this

by thedurianprince



Category: Granblue Fantasy (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:08:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24783628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedurianprince/pseuds/thedurianprince
Summary: Meeting, separation, tragedy, coincidence, and coming together, in that order. Sometimes, it takes time to accept the happiness you're given.
Relationships: Percival/Siegfried (Granblue Fantasy)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	don't carry this

**Author's Note:**

> Sometimes ya talk about PerSieg feelings at 1AM with ya friend and in all your frenzied Pheelings they give you a roadmap for your next fic. (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. THIS IS STILL ALL YOUR FAULT.) 
> 
> As almost always, the title is a dumb, barely thought-through song reference -- this time, Sianvar's song of the same name. :)

Siegfried first noticed Percival because his hair stood out, but he remembered him for other reasons. He was scrawnier than the other recruits (even Lancelot), but he held himself with strictness and discipline that didn’t quite fit his age. 

The way he met Siegfried’s eye for the first time might have been comical had they been other people. Percival had looked him dead in the eye from afar as Siegfried scanned over the new recruits, and his brows were already knit as he studied his new captain. Siegfried held his gaze, a quiet challenge and read of character, and Percival only broke it when he seemed satisfied. 

(Years later, Siegfried would realize this was probably an assessment of his competence. He’d only think to chuckle then, especially knowing how furiously Percival would train to master every last bit of tutelage Siegfried could offer.)

He wasn’t the prodigy with swordsmanship Lancelot was, but he emerged quickly as one of the most apt and diligent of the recruits. Siegfried realized quickly that this was from more than just the opportunities his royalty bloodline and perfectionist nature afforded him, but furious passion. 

“Again,” Percival demanded, when Siegfried was usually the one ordering ‘once more’ during one-on-one training. He wasn’t picking up the parry easily, but every time Siegfried bested him, the soreness he felt seemed to work like fuel. Even when the sun had gone down and there were tears in his eyes from sheer frustration, Percival would not relent until he’d unquestionably mastered it. 

Siegfried had praised his tenacity back then, but also advised him to think more of others as one of his routine meetings with Josef drew closer and closer. 

“I refuse to fail my comrades on the battlefield,” had been Percival’s answer as he raised the practice sword again, and Siegfried found himself amused and mildly worried about how badly he’d missed the point. 

\----------------------------------- 

“...So that’s it, then,” Siegfried said calmly. 

There was a long, tense pause before Percival swallowed. “...Yes. It’s over.” 

They spoke around it. Maybe because Siegfried could hear the regret and indecisiveness wavering in Percival’s voice, and he, as he always did, responded with cushioning gentleness. But it was also in how they knew one another, like the way Percival didn’t ask him why Siegfried would leave without a word for weeks at a time, or the way Siegfried never complained how often time they’d set aside for themselves turned into time Percival instead spent fixing a policy, negotiating a ruling, navigating citizens’ problems. They just relished what time they got, and of course it would only make sense that when there was none left to give, there was nothing left for them. 

“You should be proud,” Siegfried said, and the genuine warmth in his voice made Percival’s eyes sting. “You’ve grown into a wonderful prince. I think the people of Wales understand the love and respect you offer them very deeply.” 

“You have always offered Feendrache the same,” Percival replied, forcing himself to meet Siegfried’s eyes. “I wouldn’t be half the sovereign I am without you.” 

Siegfried smiled calmly as he walked up to Percival, taking his hands one last time. “Is that so?” 

Percival forced himself to not buckle under the weight of his emotions. “Without question,” he said breathily, bypassing how his throat had tightened. His heart screamed that this wasn’t the right decision, but Percival knew just as clearly that Siegfried deserved more than a pittance of time and affection.

He had to hold his breath as Siegfried kissed his forehead. He swallowed and steeled his resolve again. “....I’ll continue the cell research my scientists told you about. I’ll send word if we have a breakthrough for you.” 

“Of course,” Siegfried replied. His slit pupils had gotten more pronounced in the past few years. Percival had to study them intently to avoid noticing the small wells of tears developing in his eyes, too. 

Percival gave in to kissing him one last time before Siegfried left the room, as unceremoniously as every other time he left with words just as plain as that. 

\---------------------------------

Siegfried’s heart slammed against his chest, much harder than it had in other instances like this. He wondered if Percival could feel it as his cheek pressed over Siegfried’s breastplate, and he hoped desperately that he did. 

A forest clearing with plenty of moss good for plugging up wounds came into view, and Siegfried gently lay Percival down as his head buzzed with processing what had happened and planning what to do next. 

“Siegfried...?” Percival groaned, just as Siegfried began pressing the moss into the worst of it.

“I’m sorry.” That wasn’t what Siegfried had planned to say, it simply came out. “I caught word of an ambush at the treaty meeting, and I was too late to stop it. I was too late to warn you…” 

Percival cried out as Siegfried made the slightest move in the wrong direction. He quieted himself quickly, slapping his hand over his mouth as he forced himself upright, gesturing Siegfried to move away. He looked around for his sword, found it next to him, and started the flames. 

Siegfried understood in an instant. It wasn’t a solution he liked, but it was pragmatic and fast, and he tore a strip off of his impossibly bedraggled scarf for Percival to bite down on as he cauterized his own wounds. 

“What about,” Percival struggled out, panting after the ordeal. Siegfried fell into supporting him, a hand on his back turning into an arm around him, which then turned into another hand cupping his cheek. Percival grasped at that hand, clutching tightly through their gauntlets. “What about everyone else?” 

Siegfried hesitated. Even Percival couldn’t be prepared for just how devastatingly things had gone. 

“Siegfried,” Percival said with relieving alertness but such a dizzying, panicked blend of emotions Siegfried’s heart clutched. “Just tell me.” 

“...I took care of your assailants,” Siegfried started. “...But by the time I’d gotten there, your guards were already dead…” 

“My brother,” Percival pleaded. “What happened to my brother?” 

He truly didn’t have sufficient words. “....I’m sorry. Percival...I’m truly so sorry. I was too late…” 

Percival clutched Siegfried’s hand like a lifeline as his face broke for the first time Siegfried had truly seen. (Outside of stolen glances and coincidences, anyways.) And even then, as his chin wrinkled and his cool demeanor fell to pieces, he only had kindness to offer him. 

“No. You are utterly blameless in this,” he insisted, even as his posture crumpled and he began to sob. “Nothing...there is nothing you’ve done I wouldn’t thank you for,” he tried to insist, but the words became a wailing mess as Percival, for the first time Siegfried had ever seen, completely gave up on everything but his own sorrow. 

It had been some years since they’d agreed to separate, and even if they hadn’t, Siegfried had never seen Percival torn to shreds quite like this. But it felt so natural for Siegfried to gather him in his arms, feeling Percival clutch back as he sobbed and shook with grief, like they had been any other partnership that had woken up in the same bed that morning. 

Siegfried kept his guard up, ready to sweep them to safety and cut down anyone who posed a threat where they stood. In a terrible way, bearing Percival’s weight felt good, especially as Siegfried considered how little family Percival had left to shoulder it with him. 

It took some time for Percival to calm down, and for a precious moment where duty was at the back of his mind, he laid in Siegfried’s arms quietly as his breathing evened out. 

“...I need to ask something very selfish of you,” he said softly. 

“Anything,” Siegfried replied. 

“...Will you stay through the funeral?” 

“I’ll stay through your coronation,” he replied firmly. Percival squeezed his hand gratefully before he struggled up, and Siegfried knew that from there Percival’s focus would be only on the wellbeing of Wales and all his duties. 

He was beautiful in his dedication. Siegfried was in awe of how much pride he felt as he watched Percival in the coming weeks. He eulogized, strategized, and refused to retaliate, even for an offense as great as this. He addressed his people with hope above all as he laid yet another family member to rest, and he refused to act on solutions born of only his grief and pain. He worked closely with people from all walks of Wales to address their fears and needs in this complex time, and the recourse he sought from those responsible couldn’t resemble revenge to even the most scrutinizing onlooker. 

But behind closed doors Percival would crawl into Siegfried’s arms and be heavy. Every time Siegfried couldn’t help but think of how perfectly they fit together, even moreso than before, and how grateful he was to be able to support Percival like this. So much so that when he left during the post-coronation bustle, his heart overflowing with pride and love, he felt like he was resisting a magnet pulling him back, rather than helplessly following the one that always pulled him away. 

\-------------------------------------

Percival could scarcely believe his eyes. It felt like he were moving through honey as he grabbed the shoulder of that familiar yukata and turned Siegfried towards him. 

His face had more lines on it, but the way it lit up with joy and surprise when he saw who’d turned him around was the most carefree Percival had ever seen him. His heart swelled and overflowed into laughter for it. Siegfried immediately embraced him, and Percival gratefully held him back, not feeling this comfortable or precious since he was last in his arms. 

“What are you doing here?” he exclaimed, still smiling, a hand on Percival’s shoulder. 

“I was here earlier with Heles to help update Irestill’s trade deal with Auguste,” he explained. “And to check in on the one we brokered last year that lets Wales import its fair share of strawberries.” 

Siegfried laughed merrily. “I thought the fruit tasted better this year!” 

“What of you? You look well,” Percival said, smiling widely and softly at him. 

“I’m on vacation,” Siegfried said simply. “I wanted to see fireworks and smell salt air, so I thought I may as well.” 

Percival truly couldn’t do much but just look at Siegfried fondly. There was some grey in his hair he hadn’t noticed before, but his posture and steps seemed more alive than ever. 

“...Do you have plans tonight?” he asked before he could think better of it. 

“I would like to,” Siegfried replied with the calm smile Percival still saw in dreams with perfect clarity. “Should I take that to mean you’re free?” 

“I’m not supposed to depart until tomorrow evening. Let’s spend at least tonight together.” 

Siegfried playfully linked his arm with Percival’s before clasping their hands together. “I’d like that. It’s been some time since I’ve watched beachside fireworks with you. Wasn’t the last time when we were still traveling with the Grandcypher?” 

The last time Percival had grinned so hard his cheeks got tired, Vane and Lancelot had insisted on going out to a tavern with him like old times. 

“Let’s not reminisce,” he said, leaning towards Siegfried’s ear. “I want to properly enjoy what a beautiful thing fate’s given us.” 

\-----------------------------------------

Siegfried lingered on those words long after Percival returned to Wales, and long after Siegfried himself went back to his usual motions. He could still feel his lips and fingers pressed against all the new scars he’d gotten in their time apart, and he could still feel Percival’s breath against his ear and soft hair tickling him as he lavished him with so much sincere affection and praise. 

To have beheld Percival ascend to the throne, confident in his kindness and shrewdness, to have known him as that frustrated, teary-eyed recruit, and to find him again as just another person enjoying Auguste, the thought made Siegfried feel as much giddy joy as when Percival had first accepted his feelings. Even as the seasons changed and it began to grow cold, the warmth never quite left him as he wandered. 

He passed by a blacksmith while visiting Feendrache’s capital, and an idea and dawning realization possessed him all at once. 

Not long after that, he sent word to the king of Wales that he’d be coming to visit and hitched a ride on a farmer’s cargo carriage already on its way. He arrived at the castle of Wales as unremarkably as always, but castle staff was prepared and waiting for the moment he stepped onto the grounds. 

He was escorted through long corridors and hallways until he caught a glimpse of a courtyard garden, just beginning to transform into the fiery hues of autumn, and in the middle of it stood the brilliant, red figure he’d been so eager to see. 

“He’d like to speak to you in private,” his escort told Siegfried, which suited him just fine. Each step he took towards the garden, he felt the magnetism he felt at the coronation pulling at him, stronger and stronger until he finally entered the garden. 

Percival looked as if he had been born to bear the crown. He wore his hair long, now with a single streak of grey, and the regal capes and finery suited him so perfectly. Siegfried couldn’t stop himself, his feet taking him faster and faster until Percival just as hastily rushed towards him before they embraced, once again fitting perfectly together. 

“You have some explaining to do,” Percival murmured into Sieg’s hair, though his voice was gentler than his words. “What a cryptic letter you sent.” 

“It’s wonderful to see you,” Siegfried said, almost welling up at just that alone. “You’ll have to forgive me for that,” he continued, pulling apart just enough to look at one another appropriately. He grasped one of Percival’s hands. “....I was realizing something that I couldn’t explain in just a letter,” he offered. 

“Hum. I see.” But Percival was smiling. “I’ve done some thinking of my own, but go on.” 

Siegfried kept smiling at Percival as he pressed what he’d been clutching in his hand into Percival’s. Percival gasped as he felt what it was, before he tossed his head back, much to Siegfried’s surprise, and laughed through what sounded like tears. 

“Give me your hand,” he ordered. He definitely was speaking through tears, but Siegfried somewhat nervously complied. Percival pulled it open and deposited a ring into his open palm. 

For a moment, Siegfried’s whole being froze in a somersault of surprise, and tears flowed as he started to laugh, deep in his chest. Percival laughed with the same brilliance like when they’d run into one another in Auguste, and he cried with the same vulnerability as he had at that somber forest clearing. 

“I want to properly enjoy what a beautiful thing fate’s given us,” Siegfried quoted, both from Percival and the letter he’d sent. He gently pulled Percival’s hand open and pushed on the ring. 

Percival brought Siegfried’s hand to his mouth and kissed it reverently before he did the same. “I don’t expect you to do anything but what you would like. You don’t have to stay here. I just want you to know that you always have a warm home and family with me.” 

“I know,” Siegfried said breathily. “And I know and love how much you’ve done and will continue to do to make the same possible for all your citizens.” 

Percival smiled at him with a serene gratefulness Siegfried was eager to get used to. He pulled him close again, and Siegfried felt such a profound sense of home that he could do nothing but sigh and let his head fall onto Percvial’s shoulder in the crisp autumn air.

**Author's Note:**

> I realized after I finished this that this more or less is just Stand Inside Your Love (you know, like, the Smashing Pumpkins song) but god, I was not about to be the ULTIMATE tool and call this fic that.


End file.
